


Do I Wanna Know

by ragingscooter



Category: Rookie Blue
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-25
Updated: 2013-12-25
Packaged: 2018-01-06 01:53:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1101013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ragingscooter/pseuds/ragingscooter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A different take on what happened after the wedding. Based on the Arctic Monkeys song of the same name.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Do I Wanna Know

**Author's Note:**

> A/N At the moment I am somewhat obsessed with this song and I truly enjoy this pairing so I thought what the hell write a one shot. This takes place just after the coat room kiss at the wedding. I have altered the timeline a little, so that their "dates" (batting cage and the pick up from the hospital ) occurred before the wedding. Italics denote lyrics. Enjoy! Disclaimer I don't own The Arctic Monkeys or Rookie Blues.

Do I Wanna Know

Holly's pov

_Have you got color in your cheeks?_  
 _Do you ever get that fear that you can't shift the tide that sticks around like summat in your teeth?_  
 _Are there some aces up your sleeve?_  
 _Have you no idea that you're in deep?_  
Holly watched Gail emerge from the coat room from the bar, she had her coat and like the cat she was snuck out unseen, well unseen with the exception of Holly. Drink in hand Holly felt a pounding in her chest that she hadn't felt in ages. She absent mindedly played with the swizzle stick, she couldn't believe that she had kissed Gail, sure it was an 'over before it started' kind of kiss but a kiss nonetheless. Maybe it was the alcohol, she could blame it on the alcohol but in truth she wasn't that drunk. No the truth was that she had wanted to kiss Gail from their first meeting and now that she had…Holly had no idea where to go from here.

_I dreamt about you nearly every night this week_   
_How many secrets can you keep?_   
_'Cause there's this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow and I play it on repeat_   
_Until I fall asleep_   
_Spilling drinks on my settee_

It wasn't like her to obsess, okay maybe she would obsess about work but never a girl, certainly not a straight girl, so why were her nights and dreams occupied by Gail? She drummed her fingers on the bar as she pondered possible reasons, 1) Gail was breathtakingly beautiful and sexy…those eyes and lips…her legs in that dress…but it was more than her looks. 2) There was Gail's wit, it was scalpel sharp, few people could go head to head with Holly. Some people might find Gail abrasive or rude but Holly could see past that. 3) Gail's smile, especially the smile that she thought she hide so well. Holly like to think that it was a smile reserved for her. Now she could add the taste of Gail's lips to the list. God she was in deep. Holly picked up her phone called for a cab and left a tip for the bartender, it was time to call it a night.

_Do I wanna know_   
_If this feeling flows both ways?_   
_Sad to see you go_   
_Was sort of hoping that you'd stay_   
_Baby we both know_   
_That the nights were mainly made for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day_

Holly rubbed her hands together as she waited outside for her ride. It wasn't chilly but the night air was crisp. She heard a noise behind her and when she turned in its direction she found herself facing the object of her affection/obsession. "I thought you went home?" was all she could think to say.

"You kissed me." Gail said quietly as she took a step forward. Holly didn't know how to respond her words lost as her eyes found Gail's. "You kissed me and then left." Gail said a little louder as she took another step almost into Holly's personal space. Holly nodded as Gail took another step, she was so close that Holly could feel the other woman's warm breath mingle with her own. She could smell the champagne that was surely clouding Gail's judgment, Holly knew that she should say something, anything to diffuse the situation but for maybe the first time in her life words failed her. Holly searched Gail's eyes for some sign of what she was feeling but those stormy blue eyes betrayed nothing. "You kissed me." Gail said in what Holly could only describe as Gail's 'bad cop' tone.

"I did…I…" Holly finally stuttered as she felt Gail grab her arm and pulled her into the dark alley.

"Do it again."

_Crawling back to you_

Gail was as addictive as a drug, her lips were like morphine and Holly fell victim. What started as a kiss in and alley turned into Gail showing up at Holly's door drunk after one of her blind dates.

Gail's pov

_Ever thought of calling when you've had a few?_   
_'Cause I always do_   
_Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new_   
_Now I've thought it through_

_Crawling back to you_

Gail didn't know what she was doing, who was she kidding she knew exactly what she was doing. Gail would wake up thinking about Holly, she would go to bed thinking about Holly, she would dream of Holly. She hated that it took a night of drinking to get her to Holly's door but it did. She clenched her fist steeling her nerves to knock on the door. What was it about Holly that had Gail's insides twisted? Gail wasn't sure, she had never had feelings like this before, not with Nick, not with Chris but there was something about Holly, a pull, almost like gravity. Gail knew long before the wedding that there were more than friendly feelings between the cop and pathologist but Gail was too stubborn to acknowledge them. So stubborn that she let her mother fix her up on dates that were doomed before they even started. What she felt for Holly was complicated and Gail liked simple, Gail needed simple but here she was for the third time this week drunk at Holly's door wanting to make out like a couple of horny teenagers. Things hadn't escalated beyond some adolescent groping but in her heart she wanted more and she was certain that Holly was holding back. Maybe tonight she would let go, give into what she wanted, give into who she wanted. Gail took a deep breath and knocked.

Holly's pov

_So have you got the guts?_   
_Been wondering if your heart's still open and if so I wanna know what time it shuts_   
_Simmer down and pucker up_   
_I'm sorry to interrupt. It's just I'm constantly on the cusp of trying to kiss you_   
_I don't know if you feel the same as I do_   
_But we could be together if you wanted to_   
_Do I wanna know?_

Holly didn't need to look through the peephole to know that it was Gail on the other side of the hands shook as she unlocked the deadbolt, she wished she had the guts to ask Gail what it was that they were doing but she didn't want to lose her. For Holly things were simple, she liked Gail, she was attracted to Gail and she wanted to be with Gail. She knew it wasn't so simple for Gail but it could be, how she longed for Gail just to say the words, that she wanted this too. She opened the door to see Gail leaning against the door jam, her eyes cast down, her long fingers lightly tapping her leg, her tongue darted out moistening her inviting lips…maybe the talk could wait.

"Hey."

Gail looked up, "Hey." Holly loved how Gail's lips curved into a shy smile as she rocked on her heels. She was wearing what Holly could only describe as painted on jeans and a slate grey button up top that left little to Holly's imagination. Suddenly Holly hated Gail's blind date for the evening that he had her first. "So are you going to invite me in or are you going to mentally undress me in the hall all night?" Gail smirked. Holly had to smile, Gail had read her mind. She opened the door wide and Gail snuck under Holly's arm into the apartment. She watched Gail situate herself on the couch, making herself right at home. It was rare to see Gail at ease and it sent a thrill to Holly's heart that she could be that free in her company.

"You are staring again. Come here." Gail teased as she patted the spot next to her. Holly obliged and sat down but was pulled onto Gail's lap. For a moment neither said a word, just looked into each other's eyes as if searching for something that neither could name.

"Your date didn't last long." Holly commented breaking the silence.

Gail gaze was on Holly's lips as she spoke, "He was the son of my parents' accountant. He works as an insurance adjuster and his hobbies include using a metal detector to find change at the lake. I didn't even make it through one drink."

"I have heard that you can find some interesting things on the lakeshore."

"Nerd." Gail said as she rubbed small circles on Holly's thighs.

"Let me guess, after the "date" you made a stop at the Penny?" Holly asked as she placed her hands on top of Gail's.

Gail nodded, "I needed to cleanse after meeting Dan the metal detector man."

Holly laughed, "I see and then you decided to visit me?"

"Well yeah. I was thinking about you and found myself walking in your direction." Gail leaned and captured Holly's lips with her own. It was if Gail was trying to devour her, her tongue demanding entrance and who was Holly to deny her? As her tongue tangled with Gail's she could feel a difference in Gail's touch. Normally Gail's touch was urgent, almost as if she were being timed, but not this time. This time it was as if she were savoring it, making each touch count…as if for the last time. Holly pulled away when Gail's hand slipped under her loose v-neck tee shirt. "Too far?" Gail asked as she leaned back in to the sofa, her hand still on Holly's flat stomach.

"Where is this going?" Holly asked slightly out of breath.

"Well it could head to the bedroom, or the couch is fine with me if you prefer." Gail answered with her usual wit.

"You know what I mean Gail."

"Okay, I knew that this was coming sooner or later." Gail scooted Holly off of her lap and stood up. Holly couldn't believe it Gail was leaving, no the sad thing was she could believe it; Gail had even warned her that she was a cat and this was her escape. She watched as Gail headed out of the living room but instead of going out the front door she turned into the kitchen. Holly feeling more than a little confused followed her and found the blonde making coffee.

"What are you doing?" Holly asked as she stood in the doorway.

Gail held up a coffee filter, "Duh, what does it look like nerd. You know for someone so smart you miss a lot of simple things."

Holly shook her head, "I can see that but why?"

Gail put the filter in the coffee maker and poured in a large amount of coffee grounds into the machine. As the machine started to percolate Gail turned to face her and took a deep breath. "You asked where this…us…was going. That is going to be a serious talk…a talk that I should be sober for. Hence the coffee."

Holly was more than a little surprised, "So you will talk about us?"

Gail sat on one of the stools by the kitchen island, "Yes." The cop said simply before resting her head on the counter. "Just let the coffee do its job and then we can talk." Holly nodded and started to sit on the other stool. "Hol not to be rude but can I have a few minutes to myself? I need to get my head together and if you sit that close I am going to want to touch you and if I touch you I will want to kiss you and if I kiss you we are not going to have this talk tonight." Gail said in as serious tone as Holly had ever heard her speak.

Holly backed out of the kitchen, "Okay I will be in here whenever you are ready. I am not going anywhere."

Gail looked up and smiled that smile that Holly loved, "Neither am I."

It was almost two hours later and Holly was getting nervous, she knew that she shouldn't rush her but dammit Holly wanted, no needed to know what was going on in the feisty cop's head. She had started to pace when Gail appeared in the doorway. "You keep doing that and you won't need to go for your jog in the morning." She teased as she sat in the chair opposite the couch. "Please sit Holly."

Holly sat down on the couch and searched Gail's eyes for any sign of what was coming but all she saw was the stormy blue eyes searching hers. "I…" she started but Gail put her hand up to stop her.

"Please I need to go first, if I don't say it now I don't know if… just let me go first. I am not so great with words so bear with me." Gail pleaded. Holly could count on one hand the number of times she had heard the blond say please so she nodded. Gail took a deep breath and slowly let it out, she was flexing her fingers, curling and uncurling them against her knees. She swallowed hard and started, "You are the first real friend that I have made in a very long time."

"Friend?" Holly thought this wasn't sounding good.

"I don't let a lot of people in, I tend to try and scare them off but you…you just walked into my life with your giant lunch box and ever since then…Holly I didn't scare you off." Gail said as she started to tap her leg. "I say terrible rude things to you and you are not even phased, you laugh and quip something right back. You pick me up from the hospital and let me sleep on your bed when I was all drugged up. You take me to a batting cage and you made me stay until I hit a frigging ball! You let me drag you to a wedding where you really didn't know anyone and I know that I was being a brat but you made it fun. You kissed me."

There was nothing but silence for what felt like an eternity, "You kissed me Holly and all of the feelings that I knew were growing inside me…I couldn't deny them anymore. I don't do feelings, feelings get you hurt and I am done being hurt."

Holly felt sick but said nothing. She wanted to cry but not with Gail sitting right there. "I am not done Hol…I thought that if I gave in a little, kiss you, hold you, then the feelings would fade, get them out of my system so to speak and that was wrong of me. I don't want to use you Holly, I don't want to hurt you but I know that I am." Gail stood up and started to pace the same path Holly took a little while before. "These feelings that I was trying to get rid of…they didn't go away…they got bigger and they got stronger and now I can't go five minutes without thinking about you. I think about your smile and what I can say to make you smile or laugh. Your laugh makes my day, I can be having the worst day and then you call me with a funny story and laugh and I forget why I was pissed off. No one has ever been able to do that. You are probably thinking that I am freaking out because you are a woman and I so am I obviously but I don't really care. Your touch makes my skin burn, your kisses leave me unable to think and I have been waking up from dreams about you since our first night out almost two months ago."

Holly went from feeling sick to extremely aroused at her words. She watched Gail walk towards her and kneel down to eye level. "I suck at relationships, I am great at fooling around and fucking around but relationships not so much. When people get close I want to run but I haven't felt that with you and that scares me. The fact that I want to stick around terrifies me. I want more with you Holly I really do but I don't have the first clue of how to make us work. You tell me what I need to do to make this work and I will make it happen." Gail took Holly's hands in hers and squeezed. "Okay now you say something." Gail said with what can only be described as hope.

"You talk too much." Holly said as she pulled Gail close and kissed her with every ounce of love she had for the woman.

Gail pulled back and after licking her lips as she tried to hold back a smile, "I thought we were talking." She gestured the closeness between us, "This doesn't look like talking."

Holly nodded and created a little more distance between them, "I don't who you think you are kidding when you say that you are not good with words. Gail I know that you have trust issues but you can trust me."

"I do Holly."

"Let me finish." Holly teased and Gail rolled her eyes. "As I was saying you aren't the only one scared here. I have never felt like this before, you make me feel more in a simple kiss than I had in any of my previous relationships. I have been hurt too Gail and I stopped letting people get too close but somehow you snuck in. I tried to keep what we had friendly but in the back of my mind I knew that I wanted more. I want to be with you Gail, I will be patient if you need time, I will give it to you but I want to try. I…" she was cut off by Gail's lips hushing them with a sweet soft kiss.

"You wouldn't stop talking." Gail said softly as she broke the kiss.

"I won't say another word." Holly replied before she pulled Gail onto her lap.

_Do I wanna know_   
_If this feeling flows both ways?_

**Author's Note:**

> A/N So there it is my first foray into the Holly/Gail world. I would appreciate any feedback that you have to give. I am leaving this as a one shot unless you the readers want me to continue.


End file.
